Let’s talk about becoming a Dad. The reality is that so much of the focus on pregnancy planning is on women, and yet, men are also on their own journey to becoming fathers.

Many men find it helpful to write down the factors that are influencing their decision about having a baby

  • How does work, school and your career fit into your plans?
  • What about your partner’s ideas?
  • Is there family pressure to produce a grandchild?
  • Do you or your partner have other children?
  • Is there pressure to have a larger family and/or a big brother or sister?

Family pressure to produce a grandchild can be very intense. You may have been dealing with unrelenting questions about when you’re going to start a family for years.

If you’re in a relationship, it’s normal for one person to be ready for a baby and for their partner to be more hesitant, have a different timeline or to have other priorities.

Envisioning your life as a Dad

Many men find it helpful to spend some time thinking about and maybe even writing down some thoughts about how they envision their lives as a father.

  • What’s important to you when you consider fatherhood?
  • How do you see yourself being with a child of your own?
  • Who are your role models for fathering?
  • What did you appreciate about your father or the father figures in your life?
  • What do you want to avoid doing?
  • What kind of dad do you want to be?

More things to consider

What would you like to accomplish in your life before you take on the added responsibility of a baby?
Is your work, school, career and lifestyle in line with how you’d like it to be? And, Where does a baby fit in to all of this?

Perhaps you’re feeling pressure to delay pregnancy until you’ve accomplished your goals. No matter what the factors are that influence your decision, it’s often helpful to write them down and then take some time and think about what’s most important to YOU!

Don’t worry if this seems a little overwhelming right now and is kind of far in the future. It’s good to start thinking about these issues and talk about them with your partner.

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